The Salty Solitary

When I was younger, I lived a normal life with a husband, friends, job, busy social group, etc. After my divorce, death of a parent, death of my ex-spouse, loss of friends, and increasing chronic ill health, I’m choosing a different path.

Entering the 12th year after my life upended itself, I find I’m more than satisfied with my solitary life: I’m enthusiastic about it. I choose it, time and again, instead of re-connecting and re-committing to a life of entanglements.

If you, like me, prefer to be alone and listen to the beautiful silence – or if you’re just curious what would make someone choose this life – please be welcome here.

HERMIT RULES: (Or, “you may be a hermit if”)
1) If I don’t have to go out, why go out?
2) Outside is different than “out”; outside is a peaceful place where I can look at squirrels. “Out” is a place where I have to dress a certain way and behave a certain way or people judge me. (LBH, people judge each other relentlessly anyway. If I’m going to be found wanting, I might as well do it on terms that make me happy)
3) Other people are lovely and I adore them:
a) in settings where I can control or adapt to the needs of my pain
b) in small doses, because my social battery is TINY
4) One person, if carefully chosen, is almost the same as “being alone” in my world.
5) Energy is a scarce and precious commodity, and should be spent in ways that make my heart smile.
6) Fictional people are often the best company.
7) Talking to myself, my dog, the ghost who lives in my house, and Nature – those count as socializing.
8) Pants with waistbands are too much of a commitment.